Crippling anxiety. Need medications. Doctors won’t prescribe me the ones that work. Advice?
First let me start by saying that I am extremely well-versed in the DSM and psychotropic pharmaceuticals.
For the last few years I have been plagued by generalized anxiety and accompanying insomnia. I’ve gone to psychiatrist after psychiatrist, and they’ve always prescribed me some antidepressant or another, none of which ever work (and yes, I’ve obediently taken each for weeks or months at a time - plenty of time for their effects to kick in.) Prozac, Paxil, Zoloft, Wellbutrin, Remeron, Effexor, Remeron WITH Effexor (California rocket fuel, as they call it, and it gave me crazy side effects), then Seroquel as an anxiolytic, even Benadryl and Trazodone. I’m like a guinea pig for the pharmaceutical industry, but nothing does anything good.
The only thing that’s ever taken away my anxiety and let me function without a constant state of crippling fear is benzodiazepines. My dad just started giving his to me, and my grandma used to as well years ago. I am currently taking 1 mg of Klonopin twice a day, and for the first time in almost a year I can wake up without shaking and freaking out about every worry in my life.
Problem is, no shrink seems to be willing to prescribe me Klonopin or any other Benzo! I guess because I’m 26, they figure I’m some junkie who’ll go off and get high on them or sell them or something. I’d been self-medicating with alcohol until my dad started giving me these pills, and again, for the first time in months I don’t need to drink. Also, maybe the shrinks think I’ll abuse the meds because I experimented with recreational drugs in my late teens (eyeroll, who doesn’t?) This sucks. The only thing that helps me live a normal life and no one will prescribe it to me. What do I do? Please advise.
The anxiety predated my use of alcohol, and I never "abused" the alcohol, I merely drank just enough to relieve my anxiety - the effects of a single drink.
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I felt like this in the past. I’ve done a lot of drugs but I’ve slowed down a lot. If you’ve done drugs like Exstacy or Acid some of the long term effects is anxiety and paranoia. But part of dealing with feeling like that is sometimes understanding that there may be no quick fix or cure. You just have to sit back and relax. If you’re stressed out, take a day off. For anxiety you just have to chill out and say to the world, "Whatever dude." Try listening to music that calms you down. For me, I listen to and write techno. No lyrics, just sound for you to create your own story too. DJ Tiesto is one of my favorites.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3C6HYGWGobw&feature=related
Give this listen. It’ll chill you out, guaranteed.
January 28th, 2010 at 5:18 pmBenzo’s ae highly addictive and since you are taking them on the sly you are likely to increase your anxiety instead of helping it…… I suggest you go to therapy……… therapy can often be more help than anti depressants. No one….. I repeat no one will prescribe benzos on a regular basis to ANYONE. If you are in therapy and your therapist suggests that they might help SHORT TERM until the therapy starts to help THEN you might find a psychiatrist who will prescribe for a couple of weeks. Benzos just are not an option for long term anxiety management.
And you are still abusing drugs…….. forst the alcohol and then you are taking someone elses’s prescription benzo’s…… that is abuse…..
January 28th, 2010 at 5:18 pmWell as I’m sure you already know benzodiazipans are highly addictive and that causes doctors to only prescribe them for a short time period before having to take you off them (in the UK anyway). I have been though the same sort of experience as you recently. I’m finding it hard to leave my house and have finally been given authorised absence from college for 2 weeks (English college, before university). While I have seen some positive effects from the SSRI’s I know how frustrating this can be. Though if you can, its not a good idea to drink alcohol. It can cause panic attacks as it heightens your pulse rate. Sometimes it is difficult to tell if the anxiety caused the alcoholism or if the alcoholism caused the anxiety.
I assume your in some sort of counselling, though if not I suggest you talk to your doctor about this. Beyond that I recommend trying some of the techniques on the mind website. Some of them have been very helpful to me including the stress relif section and the sleep one.
http://www.mind.org.uk/help/diagnoses_and_conditions/anxiety
The AWARE system is also helpfull.
I have to go but I hope this helps. Good luck.
January 28th, 2010 at 5:18 pmBenzos aren’t a realistic long-term solution though, you will build a tolerance quickly and require more to keep the anxiolytic effect going. As you know, your dose goes up. When your dose goes up you get hooked and then a big ugly withdrawal.
As a nurse, we use these drugs IV for people on their deathbed to keep them comfortable. Doctors are used to using them for these applications rather than for mental illness. I believe they feel strange doing this, based on when they have used them in the past.
When antidepressants fail, it’s perfectly feasible to start combining. You will have to talk about Propranolol for physical anxiety. Perhaps Gabapentin and Lyrica, some anticonvulsants, that have anxiety-relieving properties. They may at least reduce it for you.
From the way you write, I don’t think I would want to prescribe them to you either. Especially the way you casually mention you abused alcohol for relief and illegal drug abuse as though it’s an everyday thing. You then moved onto misusing prescription medications. You are among the worst possible candidates to prescribe benzodiazepines to and I bet you’d never come off them. Your psych is doing the right thing to explore the alternatives.
You might want to reconsider the Klonopin because some of your anxiety could well be due to the downregulation of GABA receptors from the booze. Klonopin will do the same thing and you will be in a never-ending cycle! This can take up to a year for chronic alcohol users to return to normal. I don’t know how long you used it for but it may still take a while.
January 28th, 2010 at 5:18 pm