I have really bad depression, I want to help myself without medication?
i’m 16 years old i have been severely depressed since i was 12. i’m in high school now and i have very very bad episodes of emotional repression and apathy. i’ll either feel like i wish i was dead or if i’m lucky i will feel completely numb.
i go to school every morning, a school that i completely loathe and have nothing but contempt for, before coming home to my mother who constantly reminds me of how miserable i seem and how she liked me better when i was a child. i have no friends and i spend weekends alone. i don’t even like weekends because they are so lonely. i actually miss school sometimes because i get so lonely. i have no interests or compensations that might divert me from feeling so repressed all the time and i spend the entire day in anticipation for nightime when i can sleep for 8 hours and be unconscious for a while. being depressed has physically affected me as well. i’m underweight, my posture is horrific, i have insomnia, and my eyes are burny and itchy all the time. i don’t usually enjoy indulging in these narcissistic rants that beg for sympathy, but all i’m really asking is how i can help myself. i’m not suicidal and i don’t want to take medication. i’m tired of hating everyone, including myself.
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Know that God can help you live a better life if you want Him to help you. You can have a personal relationship with God by saying the prayer below. God is our Creator, all-knowing, all-powerful, eternal, holy, love. God loves us and sent us His Son, Jesus Christ, so we can go to heaven if we know and follow Him. Forever means without end — time on and on without death. Forever is what happens after we die. Either we go to heaven and be with God forever, or we go to hell which is very bad and painful forever. The good people who are saved believers in Jesus Christ go to heaven. The bad people go to hell. We need to know and follow God in this world to get to heaven in the next world. We follow God by loving and obeying Him and loving others for Him. Jesus Christ, God’s Son, is our bridge to God. Jesus died on the cross to cancel our sins. We need to accept Jesus into our life as our Lord and Savior forever to receive God’s blessing and forgiveness plus go to heaven to be with God forever after we die. This is about being a born-again Christian. Faith in God is a gift from God. You can pray for faith in God. Just speak out and ask God for the faith to believe in Him and to follow Him. Some people find faith in God when they realize the beauty in the world is made by God. Evolution can’t explain the world’s natural beauty, for example, the parks in the world, animals, flowers, peacocks, sunsets, butterflies, rainbows, etc. After you have your faith on, you can pray a sinner’s prayer to be a born-again Christian. This prayer is very important and should be said with a sincere heart and faith in God. This is the prayer: "Dear God, I know that I am a sinner and that Jesus Christ is the sacrifice for our sins. I have done the following sins (state these out) and I pray to discontinue these sins. I pray to receive Jesus Christ into my life as my Lord and Savior forever. In Jesus’ name, amen." I’m Lutheran and I like the Baptist churches too. You could check out a Christian church and also see about their weekly Bible study group as a good way to learn about God’s will for your life. You can pray to God about your daily life and have a Christian church pray for you.
November 19th, 2009 at 12:32 ammost likely its just teen angst.
November 19th, 2009 at 12:32 amI think you need to get professional help from a counselor to find ways to get your life in order. Your life is out of balance - it isn’t possibly to be happy if you have no friends. People are social creatures. i test very introverted on personality tests, and I still have to have friends around at least some of the time. It is possible you have developed a mental illness that is just plain genetic, and the weight of this illness on you has prevented you from making friends - that is a problem with getting mental illnesses and not getting help for it, you miss all the milestones you should have when you go thru life. So find a way to get counseling. i will give you my standard depression tips, but in your case, your life is out of balance. You need very competent, individualized advice, and concrete steps to follow to improve your situation. Your mom isn’t helping, and don’t let her drag you down. She probably got treated crappy when she was a girl & is passing it down to you, so remember that, and work on getting involved with other people.
Standard advice:
If your depression is worse in winter, try to get more sun. You may have seasonal affective disorder (SAD) or your depression could be partly seasonal. Use a light box (10,000 Lux (light intensity) at about 20” - about $300 online, don’t get at a local store, they charge more, you don’t need full spectrum, it needs a UV filter, the Sunray is a good brand). I have extra windows, spend time in bright rooms, painted the walls peach & yellow & have a skylight ( it helps!!!!!)
Try meditation like progressive muscle relaxation or guided imagery. It reduces stress, & depression. See The Anxiety & Phobia Workbook by Edmund Bourne for examples. Free 15 minute guided imagery download at healthjourneys.com.
***** #1 MOST HELPFUL Go out with friends, & if you don’t have any, join a club & MAKE yourself go until you look forward to it. “Isolating” makes depression worse.
Exercise 1/2 hour a day, & anytime you feel depressed. Exercise is a great mood stabilizer & reduces anxiety. LOTS OF RESEARCH SUPPORTS THIS. Make it a priority!!
Insomnia?: Go to bed & get up the same time each day, even weekends. Don’t use your bedroom to watch TV, read or use the computer. Don’t do stuff that revs you up before bed, like exercising & using the computer. Light from computer screens & TV wakes you up. Use that last hour to wind down-Take a bath? Make the bedroom very dark, even cover up the alarm clock. Use a noise machine (makes wave sounds etc.) to cover up disturbing sounds. Avoid caffeine in afternoon & evening. Try soundsleeping.com for free relaxing sounds downloads.
Put a lot of colorful, happy things around the house & let the sun in. Do nice things for yourself. Make a list of things that make you happy. On my list: bread fresh from the oven, the scent of Jergen’s cherry almond lotion, the crisp sound of a saltine cracker breaking, fresh sheets on the bed, standing in the boat flicking topwater lures onto the water, etc. Use all your senses & read that list when you are breaking down
Work on time management if you are overwhelmed. Cut back on other responsibilities so you can spend more restorative time with friends & family. Ask for help if depression makes it hard to keep up with chores.
You got a significant other? Extra physical touch is helpful. Many people are touch deprived, so hold hands more, hug more, give shoulder rubs, etc. A pet is great if your home situation allows you to get one. (Don’t if you can’t commit to it for 15 years)
Do NOT listen to sad music! It makes things worse! Listen to upbeat stuff- same with movies & novels.
DISTRACT yourself when you are hurting. Read a novel, watch a comedy, go out with friends, play cards, play a video game, whatever is mentally all-consuming. This is a VERY helpful tip!!
Volunteer. Research shows that helping others makes you feel better about yourself. It also keeps you more involved in the community. Many people find comfort being involved in religion. Get help from your pastor. Be aware that some pastors from conservative faiths don’t “believe” in mental illness & will tell you to go off your meds & pray more – don’t go to such a pastor for “help” if your faith is like this.
For chronic & severe depression, go to mentalhealthrecovery.com & order a $10 WRAP (Wellness & Recovery Action Plan) booklet – it helps you write up your own daily plan to maintain mental health & a checklist for a crisis. Consider filling out a psychiatric advance directive to protect your rights & inform professionals about your care if you have a crisis. Links to your state’s free PAD can be found at bazelon.org.
If suicidal, find a community hospital with an inpatient behavioral health unit (check yellow pages) & go or have someone take you. Don’t call 911 unless you have already hurt yourself, because if it is just psych symptoms, it isn’t an ambulance that comes, it is the police, & they will take you to the closest place & that could be a horrible state hospital.
Cognitive Behavioral therapy is the most effective kind of counseling. Try free computerized CBT at moodgym.anu.edu.au. Computerized therapy appears to be almost as effective as counseling, research shows.
Good luck. I learned this information from numerous classes & books.
November 19th, 2009 at 12:32 amBe happy. You obviously want to be. I’m in high school and there are assholes everywhere. Just care about what you think and tell anyone else who says otherwise to screw off. Medication doesn’t do anything but prove you’re incapable of being happy on your own, and suicide is the most selfish act of all. If you truely want to be happy then just be happy. Depression is a choice.
November 19th, 2009 at 12:32 amWell, my advice to you is to get out on the weekends.. Go to a public pool, swim some laps, work on your tan, meet some new people…
High school sucks for everybody.. even the popular ones, they just have different problems..
Just grin and bear it, life is good once you’re out.. im me if you wanna talk
November 19th, 2009 at 12:32 amThere’s something bothering you deep inside that you either can’t or your not trying hard enough to figure out. It has to do something related to your family or someone that you loved the most. You have to understand that you’re the only one that can help you. It’s great that you realize that this problem is affecting you, but you have to do a lot more than that. Try to have a talk with your mom, because she’s the only one that will understand you no matter how she is with you, she wants to know. Even though you don’t feel like it right now, but I strongly suggest you reach out for some friends, go out with them, share your secrets with them. Not right away, but slowly you’ll adjust, believe me. Than keep a journal with you, whenever your angry, happy, sad whatever you’re dealing with at the moment, let it out on that piece of paper and keep it somewhere where no one can’t find it.
November 19th, 2009 at 12:32 amMy dear, don’t let this depression control you like this, you have your whole life ahead of you. Life is beautiful, don’t let anything or anyone ruin it for you. In God’s eyes, your precious and he doesn’t like to see you like this, so get yourself together and face the challenges, it’ll feel good!
first off get outside more… the fresh air and exccercise boosts "happy chemicals", eat right… yes all those processed foods u eat as ateen have a affect on your overall health and happiness, get a hobby… i was really depressed as a teen and i picked up alot of hobbies. get a pet … anything u can take care of will bring u self worth. try plants tooo… i grew a garden and that made me happier.. lots of plants can grow indoors. ask your mother if u can have a pet fish at least… some goldfish are easy to take care of cheap and all u need is a bowl and cheap food. i know it sounds boring.. but books helped me through high school and depression alot and still do. i bike sometimes when i feel low.. the fresh air and exercise make me feel ebtter after then i eat healthy foods like fruit and some yogurt… apples and soem things are cheap and in season. i was a loner as a kid too and i’m not the most social person so when i met soem people i kept in touch thorugh penpals… and try keeping a journal yes sounds girl but writing down feelings is highly therputic and most psycologists and therpists use writing as a therapy.when i ‘ve had a bad day ill write letters to no one and after ill think over hwat i just wrote. helps put things into perspective. and its normal for some kids to get depressed during teen years… the hormonal chnages.. the stress of high school, figuring out who u are … its common and u arent alone. see if your mother can get u into a support group, its not medicine and its just havign soemone going through same thing to talk to. and talking is always the first step. i don’t really think medication is the best choice for most teens since… its so common but many times as long as they know someone cares or is going through same thing .. it often gives them soemthing to work with. if u have the abilitiy… see if u can volunteer at a animal shelter near you. animals are proven to be therputic and i’m sure your mother would love to get u out of house on saturdays and sundays and i’ll give u soemthign to look forward to while giving back to your community. many homeless shelters, libraries, thrift shops could use the volunteers.. i had no friends growing up either and i spent my extra time on weekends at the local nursing home( and it made me feel so much btter… leats i could use the toilet on my own), and the thrift store near home( plus i got a small allowance from my group home… i was from a abusive home and got sent to a group home) so i could buy small things no oen wanted and i could fix em up.hobbies help alot . biking, reading, fixing up stuff, arts and crafts, i kept a pet fish,( only pet i coudl have) i grew soem plants,( forget me nots i grew) i learned how to cook and bake, i did chores to keep mind busy.. and moving around really does help, i started doign origami, i made jewelry and i sold it to people… i still sell stuff on ebay… you’d be surprised what a different scenery in room will do too, wash those windows and add a bit of those febreeze flameless candles ( scented in soemthign that u like) and letting sun in will do. yes i know its sounds crappy.. but do your own book reading club.. i know many local libraries have book clubs where u can go and sign up read the book and talk over stuff .. sounds girly i know but reading is highly theraputic, i’m a big otaku! i watch anime online for free when im down. just breathe in a breathe out and get soemthing healthy to eat.. hug someone( tactile stimulation is important for any human) and see if your mother will see if u can volunteer soemwhere. and school projects u get do really well in then… i always went over board with mien the makign of stuff was fun. and ask your teachers if they know anywhere u can volunteer.. and at your age with a school permit u can work part - time… i know i did having money to get stuff with to do was cool. and the majority of friends u will get are from work.
November 19th, 2009 at 12:32 amI’ve ‘been there / done that’ . . .
1. You might want to *make sure that you aren’t contributing* to the problem with a habitual negative attitude:
"You Can Fight Pessimism w/ Positive, Goal-Oriented Thinking" http://watchtower.org/e/20040422/article_03.htm
2. IF you are ingesting ANYTHING containing either caffeine or theophyline,
CUT IT OUT of your diet / medicine. . . These constituents have been linked to serious psychological imbalances, including –though not limited to– depression . . .
"Caffeine Allergy: A Hidden Allergy & Toxic Dementia" http://successfulschizophrenia.org/stories/whalen01.html
Low thyroid / adrenaline levels often cause depression.
Organic Virgin Coconut Oil &/or Kelp supplement/s have reportedly helped many with this problem.
Dessicated bovine thyroid is taken by some, to treat it—You have to be careful not to take too much though! Also, note that some medications cause low thyroid hormone levels . . .
Natural Remedies for Adrenal & Thyroid hormone deficits {Part 3 http://keephopealive.org/v2002.html
SCROLL WAY ^ DOWN to see it all!
No matter which gender you are, the herbs, foods, & other recommendations reported on at these websites may help:
Depression & Mental Fatigue—Alternative remedies http://project-aware.org/Managing/Alt/depression.shtml
"Natural Remedies for Depression"
- Altering the brain’s chemistry to elevate mood
http://chiro.org/nutrition/FULL/Natural_Remedies_for_Depression.shtml
"5-HTP And The Serotonin Connection" [Tryptophan] http://chiro.org/nutrition/FULL/5-HTP_and_the_Serotonin_Connection.html
3. With or without the problems of depression & apathy, it has been found that spirituality is directly linked to one’s well-being. So I highly recommend looking into this aspect as well:
"Why Care About Spiritual Things?" :
- Spirituality and Your Well-Being—A Positive Link!
http://watchtower.org/e/20040201/article_01.htm
"How to Find Real Happiness"
- Think of Your Spiritual Needs
- Keep your Life Simple
- Happiness and Self-Worth
- Hope—Vital to Happiness
http://watchtower.org/e/20010301/article_02.htm
"Finding Hope in a World Full of Distress"
http://watchtower.org/e/20070515/article_02.htm
My *Best Wishes* for your FULL recovery!
November 19th, 2009 at 12:32 am